Thursday, May 18, 2006

Cracking the Dating Code

Out of my previous post have come a couple of conversations that have prompted me to write on this next subject: dating, which is the approach our society has taken to guy/girl relationships. Having been through 2 years and nearly 9 months of it myself, and now looking forward to finally being married, I wanted to share some reflections with you.

I don't like dating.

I don't like having to watch how much time I spend with Jamie, and whether or not we're alone and have to continually monitor how our physical relationship is doing. I don't like seeing him even as much as I do and having to say goodbye, because I want to be with him all the time!

I love the time I've spent with Jamie, but I don't like the concept of dating. There were many times when I wondered, there must have been another way that God intentioned for a guy and girl to meet, fall in love and get married. A way where you don't have to stress about physical temptation or get burned by succumbing to it, and where there isn't that pattern of getting together with someone, then breaking up, again and again and again!
Think of your friends, and how many girlfriends or boyfriends they've had, and how hurt they've been when the relationship broke up. Where does this desperation for companionship come from?? Are we handling it in the right way? This is a deep issue that is really hard to discuss on a blog...

Sometimes I think there must have been some beauty and truth in the way they did weddings thousands of years ago. Two sets of parents got together and decided that their children would be betrothed, and when they were of age, they got married, often without ever meeting. Then they would start their life together, get to know one another physically after the wedding, which to some seems unthinkable. But guess what: they stuck it out. Compared to today's, the rate of divorce back then is hardly worth mentioning.

I'm not saying that we should go back to that extreme, but I am saying that the dating pattern we've set for ourselves today does not seem to be bringing glory to God, or us the fulfillment we seek.

Let's put our heads together. What are your thoughts?


At Monday, May 29, 2006, Blogger Marie-Hélène said...

Ha, I admit it's a cheesy title, but I thought it was clever. :)
I guess not many people have much to say on this topic, controversial as it is...

At Thursday, June 15, 2006, Blogger Ben Peterson said...

The problem with the title is that you didn't crack anything. You politely suggested that we all discuss a possible cracking after some discusion. How very Canadian of you. ;)


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